To Repel Attraction is to Attract Repulsion

In the book of Ecclesiastes in the Bible, chapter 3, verse 1, it says that "there is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens." Though there may indeed be a time for all possible things, there may not need to be. Some ideas are simply meant to remain in the mind.

My friend Micah called me up one day and said she wanted to try an experimental restaurant but that she did not want to experience the occasion alone, so of course, I agreed to accompany her. After all, with it involving food, how could I resist?

Cowfish in Birmingham, Al

Logo from restaurant website 

Tucked away in the Summit shopping center of Birmingham stands a restaurant that has taken a leap of faith. If I were a sorority girl and could use one phrase to describe my memory of this place, it would be "I can't even." This phrase has never fit more appropriately.

Outside the restaurant is a sculpture of a cow-fish (the head of a cow, the body of a fish), as if one actually existed. Apparently, the place is a hot spot, for Micah and I were added to the wait list with the log backed up for an hour.

Once we were finally seated within the restaurant, I took a look around. Cow and fish. Burgers and sushi. American and Japanese. Red and yellow. Forks and chopsticks. But wait, there is more. Legos. Pac-man. Ukiyo-e paintings of fat Japanese men eating burgers. Art of colonials eating sushi. Aquariums. Talking bathrooms. And it goes on and on and on. Before even taking a seat, I was stressed, but I was not about to give up.

For the appetizer, we ordered blackened tuna nachos, which as bizarre as they were, were absolutely delicious. Somehow, the blend of crab rangoon with the blackened tuna on top of the crispy wonton chips with its dab of salsa and guacamole was insanely mouthwatering. But even in this moment, I could not categorize my feelings. Was I pleased? Was I appalled? Well, I continued.

For the main course, Micah ordered the cowfish bento box which was supposedly the perfect choice in matching the theme of the place. It came with three different sushi rolls (California, spicy tuna, and Philly roll), edamame, sweet potato fries, Thai cucumbers, and an American mini-burger. Led by the hypnotic vibe of the restaurant, I ordered the 4-S (Sear-iously Sensational Sushi Sandwich) which served Koji tuna and yellowtail in sandwich form, with the "bun" made of kani and sushi rice, along with a side of Thai cucumbers. The sambal sesame soy dressing that was then drizzled over the sandwich was spicy at one end of the spectrum while the side of cucumbers was at the opposite end by being overbearingly sweet. Individually, each item was tasty, but even as I ripped apart my sandwich breading to see how all the ingredients were crafted into a bun... Was I pleased? Was I appalled? No. Yes. I was confused. So very confused. And I never ever get confused about food or the atmosphere surrounding the food. Never. 

At that point, I turned to Micah and with a lowered voice expressed my bewilderment. "Micah, my dear," I said, "Thank you so much for bringing me here. I am really glad you love the place, and I am glad I have had the experience. But never bring me back here again." Micah, for some odd reason, seemed thrilled that she had succeeded in confusing me with food, as if that was some kind of goal on her bucket list.

And it is done. I am never going back. I can appreciate the creativity. I can even admit the fine quality of food. I have never been more intrigued, and I have never been more horrified. Kudos, Cowfish. I can't even.

Exchanged Greeting with T-Town

Sometimes things can get violent over this. Sometimes friendships will be broken over this. Sometimes there will be mixed feelings of superiority over this. Football. And currently, I have friends who are trying to pull me from both sides. There is Auburn. And then there is Alabama. Thankfully, at this point, I can lay down the Georgia Bulldog card, and all I receive is a sigh and a pitying smile.

But on this particular day, I was taking a visit to see my date in T-Town, otherwise known as Tuscaloosa, home of the University of Alabama.

Glory Bound Gyro Co. - Tuscaloosa, Al

Logo from restaurant website

The center of town actually does not look that different from Birmingham, except perhaps a bit cleaner than some of the Birmingham downtown area. It was just starting to drizzle, and I was waiting for Connor under the awning of the front door. As I turned, I saw a flash of crimson as he came running up out of the rain shirted in the well-known school color with the flashy, cursive 'A' stitched into the fabric of his polo. So much pride. 

So, Connor knows I am obsessed with food. This was actually the first time he picked out the place for the both of us to eat, and I was kind of nervous. If it was terrible, I would never have made a mention of it on my blog, because... well, I am not that cynical. Thankfully, it turned out to be an absolutely wonderful experience, and I feel overjoyed that his first choice was something that I can write about. Now that I have made this first leap of faith, I can trust all his future choices will be equally as memorable. No pressure. 

The inside of the restaurant was very open and spacious, definitely inviting from the rain that was then pouring outside. My first shocker of the evening was that Connor confessed he had never before tried hummus. After letting me pick the three different flavors, he ordered for us the hummus trio appetizer in spinach pesto, Mediterranean olive, and original flavors. As we dipped into the different chickpea blends with our side of pita, I watched Connor's expression as he sampled each flavor. The spinach pesto was his favorite, a natural choice considering it removed the majority of the bitterness of the olive or chickpea. I begged him of course to try the kalamata olive sitting in the middle of the dip, but I had no success. He adamantly shook his head 'no,' and proceeded to tell me about 'The Olive Theory' presented on the show How I Met Your Mother, which at the time, I was convinced he was making up. Well, there is still time. 

When our waiter came back for our entree requests, I ordered the falafel gyro with the side of cottage fries, and Connor ordered the hot ham and cheese gyro with his side of cottage fries. I am pleased to say that the falafel gyro was the best one I have ever had at a Greek restaurant, and the stocky potato wedges were perfectly seasoned. I had to keep myself from doing a little dance in my seat, when I tasted how perfectly savory the fries were and how excellent the homemade tzatzaki sauce was on the gyro.

Overall, this place was great! I could not eat everything that night so I packed up the leftovers and enjoyed it for lunch the next day. It was surprisingly tasty even the second go round. After dinner, we decided to take a stroll around town, on which journey we were greeted by an older gentleman decked out in Alabama apparel who proceeded to share questionable jokes about the Alabama team and their opponents. Thankfully, Connor handled the situation gracefully before any more "humor" could exit his mouth. 

I feel I had an appropriate introduction to Tuscaloosa in all her pride and glory, no pun intended. My readers should definitely drop by this enjoyable restaurant on the corner. Of course, on a more personal note, because of the individual that lives in T-Town, I have every intention of returning.